Brenda Rosaaen C.E.C. ~Personal Development Coach~

Personal Development- Now What?

Since I've started coaching professionally, it seems more and more people are re-thinking their lives.  Initially the first commonality I noticed was the age range, roughly between 37 and 40 give or take a year or two. Men,women, single, or with families it didn't matter. It's almost like they are on the verge of a mid-life crisis, but not quite there yet. They are just beginning to question and wonder.

The more I began to explore this,I found how common this also is among stay-at-home moms that are feeling like they "need a life too",(believe me I understand, been there done that!). Also the baby-boomers wondering what's around the corner in the next stage of their life.

Can you relate to any of the following dilemmas that others are talking about?

*I feel like time is passing me by.

*I haven't accomplished all that I thought I would by the time I've reached my current age.

*I feel an internal pull that I can't explain to make a shift in my life.

*Do I really want the next 20 years to be the same as the last 20?

*How much time do I really have left? How do I make the most of it?

*Is this all there is?

*I look at other people my age and can't believe they have it so together, and I'm still struggling.

*I feel like I'm stuck and don't know where to begin.

*I know there is more out there for me. How do I experience that without sacrificing the good things I already have in my life?

*I feel guilty and selfish for even wondering about these things. I should just be satisfied with what I already have and not rock the boat.

Do any of the above statements resonate with you? Know that you are not alone. These are all very common thoughts and feelings. The question is, Do you want to do anything about it?  More importantly, How long are you willing to feel this way? Most people live their lives with these thoughts and feelings swept under the rug only to find that in their later years,they wonder what they missed out on.

The good news is you don't have to make drastic changes to your life, if you don't want to.  By working with a Personal Coach, you can fulfill that desire for more, sometimes by just making a few simple tweaks. Doing that will shed more light on things and begin to bring more perspective to your situation. Just put your name and e-mail in the box in the upper right corner. Together we can see how coaching can work for you. So when you are 70 you won't be thinking: Shoulda, Coulda,Woulda....

;) Brenda

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Personal Growth - the missing piece

Personal growth and self-help programs have been around forever it seems. How could there be a missing piece? OK, maybe it's not missing, but I would say it's a piece that definitely gets overlooked.

It all begins with you. At least that's what most of the programs out there will tell you. They tell you, you have to love yourself first. They tell you, motivation comes from within - heck, I can't tell you the number of times I have said that one myself. But what about a support system?

What if we've been going about this the wrong way? Maybe it begins with a support system... Noah St.John of the Success Clinic, calls it your "loving mirrors". They are the people in your life that often see your amazing qualities before you can see them yourself. As he puts it, "You can't see your own eyes." We need people in our lives that not only remind us of our hidden talents, but people that bring it to our attention in the first place.

I am truly blessed to have some amazing friends, their personalities couldn't be more different from each other. They all seem to notice different attributes about me that I don't often see myself. And when I get that reminder, it feels amazing! Sometimes it feels shocking, as some characteristics are ones I admire in others, but could never imagine it in myself.

Maybe motivation does come from within, however genuine words from someone near and dear to you, can often be just the spark you need when you are feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or just don't know what your next step should be.

Next time you're around the supportive people in your life, really listen to what they are saying about you because, "We can never see ourselves as we truly are."~Noah St.John

~Brenda ;)

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Goals- What's stopping you?

What's holding you back from achieving your dreams?

Are you waiting for money? Waiting for the time to be right? Waiting for your kids to be grown? Waiting for additional knowledge?

We all have the same 24 hours in a day. How quickly those days pass.Where were you 5 years ago? Did you make progress towards your goals and dreams during that time, or were you waiting for something, someone? Do you want the next 5 years to unfold as the previous ones have? What are you going to do differently?

What are you afraid of? Success? Failure? The opinions of others? Maybe you don't think you are good enough. Maybe you don't think you deserve it. The reasons are endless. Are they really reasons, or are they just excuses?

Often excuses come disguised as reasons, true actual fact, or so we think. They are beliefs that we allow ourselves to use, that in the end limits us from becoming or doing more than we could have ever imagined.

What would happen if you decided not to listen to all the reasons and excuses? How would that feel to take a step (or two..) forward towards your dreams, Now? Would you feel guilt because you didn't start earlier? Or would it feel great because it wasn't as hard as you thought it would be?

The only thing holding you back is you.

;) Brenda

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Goal Setting - Where are you going?

While working with a Direct Selling company years ago, I had to do a presentation on goal setting at the company's national convention.   While preparing for my talk, I ran upon the following quote:

"If you don't know where you are going, how will you know if you're on the way there?" 

I have no idea who first said this.  I just know it struck a chord with me when I first heard it.  So much so, that I wrote it on a piece of poster board and taped it to my office wall.   It's a great reminder when I'm feeling stuck or like I'm getting off track.

Are you feeling stuck?

Do you even know where to start?

Look at the first part of the quote again. Where do you want to go? What is it that you want to accomplish?

That is your big goal, your vision.  Now it's time to break that down into smaller steps, more managable tasks that will eventually lead you to where you want to be.  It's like taking a road trip to someplace you've never been. You've decided on your destination, now you need the map to tell you which roads and exits that you need to take in order to get there.

Not sure what steps you need to take to get there?  Try brainstorming, make a list of all the possible things you may need to do, set a time frame for getting these things done. Maybe you're not sure how to do some of the tasks.  It's been said that once you have a clearly defined goal, with genuine feeling and desire, that you start to take action on, the 'how' will just come and things will begin to fall into place. It may be in the form of additional knowledge that comes along or even people that show up in your life. 

The universe has a funny way of bringing you what you need when the time is right.  You just need to know what you want and be ready for it when it appears.

;) Brenda

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Law of Attraction Tool

Dream board, vision board, whatever you choose to call it, it can be a great tool for helping to put the Law of Attraction into action.

A vision board can be as simple or as extravagant as you choose.  There are all sorts of places online, interactive sites where you can create your own, print it off.  Other places you can download programs or even order dream books with step by step instructions for each page.

The basic idea is that your vision board reflect the things that you want in your life.  Look at all the different areas of life - relationships, family, career, social, health & wellness, fun & enjoyment, personal development and even material things. Visualize each area. Is there a picture that comes to mind? 

Find a picture that represents that, in a magazine, a photograph, you can even check out Google Images.  Maybe it's a word that represents what you want.

Just like with the Law of Attraction, when it's detailed, personalized and has feeling attached the more impact it seems to have.  Place your vision board in a location you see everyday as a reminder.  If you're starting small, maybe on your fridge.

I started my vision board 5 years ago - with just a few items on it. It's grown over time and is now 2 pieces of poster board, with images and words.   For example: Change, Laughter, Leadership, Profiting From Fun, and The Day Has Arrived.... are just a few of the words I have.  I also have pictures of my dream house, a pile of money and vehicles for my husband and myself.

Mine is on my office wall, as I look at it I see all the things that have come to pass, sometimes I'm amazed by it.  I see a sofa that looks amazingly similar to the one now sitting in my living room, a 4 wheeler that I didn't think we would ever have, and a car that is the exact color make and model of the one now sitting in my driveway! 

By the way, when I actually bought that car, I went to the dealership with a completely different car in mind - or so I thought.  It was the next day when I looked at my board and made the connection. The lesson there?  Be careful what you wish for! 

If you haven't started one yet, why not give it a try?  It could be fun :)

~Brenda

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